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I’ve had a lot of time to reflect this year. Being cooped up in the house 24/7 for months will do that to you. I’ve spent a lot of time worrying, stress eating, stress drinking, and biting my nails. But as we approach the end of 2020 (thank GOD), I’ve been thinking a lot about my personal development goals for the new year.
This past year has been a challenge for all of us, to say the least. Personal development goals + professional goals you had in mind at the beginning of the year might have gotten derailed when the pandemic hit.
I know that for me personally, I started off the year strong- promising myself that this was GOING to be the year I finally got my shit together and turned my blog into a full-time career.
Things were going great for the first couple of months. I was motivated and more productive with my blog than I had been in a long time.
Before 2020, I had kind of put my blog on the back burner to other things in my life. I was pregnant for most of 2018, and taking care of a newborn and a 5-year-old the rest of the year and through 2019.
In January 2020, I made up my mind to really focus on this blog and grow it into a full-time career for myself. This is something I have always wanted to do, and even though I have been blogging for a long time- I never FULLY committed to it.
So I made a promise to myself that no matter what, I was going to make it happen in 2020.
But then…. The great Quarantine of 2020 happened.
My kids and I quarantined fully for almost 100 days. We only left the house to go on walks or play in the back yard. Our schedules and routines were thrown off, to say the least.
It was a real challenge, and for a long time just keeping my kids fed and happy was all I could manage to do in a day.
It felt impossible to think about much of anything else, especially my work.
We’re still spending as much time at home as possible, but with the proper safety measures, we were able to take the kids out to do some fun things over the summer.
It took me a few months to get back into working on my blog and start focusing on the goals I set for myself at the beginning of the year.
Speaking of yearly goals…
My Personal Development Goals for 2020:
- Lose 20 pounds
- Spend more time with my kids
- Drink less
- De-clutter my house
I certainly achieved the goal of spending more time with my kids. But the rest of them… let’s all laugh together.
My blogging goals for 2020:
- Increase traffic
- Take on new freelance projects (I took a break from my freelance work during the quarantine)
- Create & sell digital products
- Write and publish at least one blog post per week
- Work on affiliate marketing strategy
- Master email marketing + grow my email list
I can say now, looking back, despite everything that has happened this year, I have at least achieved all of my 2020 blogging goals. They might seem like small ones, but I’m proud that I was able to accomplish them amidst the chaos that was 2020.
Since it’s now November 2020, and Christmas + New Years Eve are sneaking up on us, I thought this would be a good time to sit down and write out my personal development goals for 2021.
Happy New Year never sounded so good, right?
I don’t believe in ‘New Year’s Resolutions’… you won’t catch me vowing to lose 20 pounds or doing a ‘dry January’ in 2021, but I think it’s important to reflect on the past year and write out some goals for the new year.
2020 threw us for a loop, but we’re about to crush our personal development goals for 2021.
We’ve all had a tough year, and I know that I have been left feeling discouraged and fearful of what our future looks like in this country.
But I think that if we can just hang in there a little while longer, we will discover that not only can we achieve our personal development goals this year- but we can do anything we’ve ever imagined for ourselves.
How to Crush Your Personal Development Goals This Year
1. Social Media Detox
In 2021, I really want to focus on stopping the comparison cycle. Every morning, the first thing I do is check my phone.
Usually my email first, then Twitter and Instagram. I don’t do Facebook anymore, because it is the actual worst.
Checking my Twitter feed usually leaves me feeling a little bit outraged because I follow a lot of current events and political accounts. Instagram often leaves me feeling inadequate or shameful.
I know I’m not alone here. Social media is great, and a powerful tool when it is used in the right way. But I have to stop and ask myself: why am I inviting feelings of outrage and shame into my daily life?
Sometimes I am inspired by social media, but if I had to assign a percentage to the number of times my Instagram feed left me feeling inspired versus how many times it’s left me feeling extremely inadequate I would say it’s 80% shame and 20% inspiration.
Why? Why the hell does any of this even matter?
It doesn’t.
I wish I was better at turning it off and tuning it out, but I’m just not wired that way. My plan for 2021 is to spend as little time on social media as possible and to work on blocking out those feelings of shame and anger that I associate with it.
Doing a social media detox every now and then is great for our mental health, and I think we are all much more creative and productive when we stop comparing ourselves to everyone on the internet.
When we stop trying so hard to be liked by filtering and editing our lives into perfect little squares. When we start experiencing our lives and paying attention the all the tiny little moments we miss when we’re viewing someone else’s filtered, edited lives online.
2. Find a quiet place to work at least once a week
This one is especially important if you have children, like me. I swear my kids will spend hours being quiet and playing independently, until the moment I open my computer to get some work done.
What is it about children that the very moment we need them to be quiet and calm is the exact moment to start acting bat shit crazy?
My two-year-old is especially good at this. The minute I open my laptop, he will stop whatever it is he was doing and direct his energy towards interrupting me.
I recently saw a fellow blogger post about how she has recently started to check into a hotel once a week, just for the day, to get some work done in peace.
To which I say: why the hell didn’t I think of that?
One of my goals for 2021 is to make it a priority to find a place outside of my home that I can work from, even just for a few hours once a week.
I think this is something that will really help me become more productive, more creative and more efficient.
You know you’re a parent when working alone feels like self-care.
3. Put your health first
Something that I have been meaning to work on for years is getting more sleep.
It hasn’t exactly worked out.
I’m pretty sure I haven’t had a good night’s sleep in eight years.
But it’s such an important part of not just our physical health, but mental health as well. How can you be productive and motivated if you’re constantly exhausted?
I know that our culture wants us to believe in the constant ‘hustle and grind’. That if we’re not being productive, we’re failing.
But if I’m being honest… I just don’t have time for all that. I need to rest.
There is nothing shameful about resting. Whether that’s in the form of a mid-day nap or letting your kids do a movie marathon on Saturday morning so you can sleep in.
In 2021, I want to make it a priority to sleep more. Not only to sleep more but to just rest more in general.
This goal is part of my overall ‘health’ goal for 2021, which includes a vitamin regimen, exercise, eating better, drinking less, and all that good stuff.
My goal here is not to lose weight or try to improve my appearance. Or, I should say- that isn’t my primary goal.
My primary goal with making these changes to my lifestyle is to feel better. Physically and mentally.
When we’re taking care of ourselves, physically and mentally, we are able to be more creative, productive and generally get more shit done.
4. Invest in your business + continuing education
To date, I have never bought a blogging or business course.
It’s not that I don’t believe in their value, or think I already know everything there is to know.
I just have a hard time pulling the trigger on certain purchases. What if I invest a good chunk of money into a course and find that it doesn’t actually teach me anything?
In the nearly eight years I have been blogging, I’ve never found a way to justify spending money on a blogging course. And I am also really bad at admitting I need help, even in the form of paying someone else to teach me something.
It’s a character flaw that I’m not especially proud of, but one that I am working on!
Continual education is important in many, almost all professions. The same is true for bloggers.
I am always learning something new about this business, especially because it is constantly changing and evolving as the internet changes and evolves.
I’ve read so many blog posts from successful bloggers where they talk about a certain course, and the impact it had on their success.
My goal for 2021 is to find and invest in a high-value course that will help me take my blog to that next level.
5. Prioritize mental health + self-care
About a month ago, I told my therapist I was going to start meditating and writing in a gratitude journal.
Every week, she asks me how that’s going and I have to admit that I once again failed to do either thing.
I do believe that meditation and journaling are two things that would benefit me wildly, but I struggle with the self-discipline to make them a priority in my day to day.
I ‘forget’ to find 5 minutes to meditate or scribble down a few things I’m grateful for, telling myself that I just have too much to do. Or that it would be impossible to find time to meditate without one of my kids interrupting me.
But those are just lame-ass excuses, and I don’t want to be that girl.
In 2021, I’m prioritizing my self-care and letting go of the guilt associated with it.
I believe that in order to produce and create our best work, we should do everything we can to be the best versions of ourselves that we can be.
Becoming the best version of ourselves requires vulnerability, conscious effort, and a deep understanding of who we are and what we want for ourselves.
Self-care is critical to our mental health, and only when we start to take care of ourselves in this way can we start to better understand who we are and show up for our lives in ways we were too scared to before.
6. Laser focus + Quality over Quantity
In 2021, I’m taking the ‘quality over quantity’ approach to my business.
I have a ton of ideas, and they’re all over the map.
Some of the brilliant ideas I’ve had in the last week alone: start an online jewelry boutique, start a local wine delivery business, start marketing my freelance social media and web design services to local businesses, start a thrift fashion blog, go to law school and become the next Kathleen Zellner.
I mean, it is a never-ending loop. All of those things are totally possible, but only if I focus on one at a time.
Another one of my lovely character flaws is that I lose interest easily. I was never really passionate about anything enough to turn it into a career- I never wanted to be anything specific.
No lifelong dreams of becoming a doctor or teacher. I’ve always kind of just wandered, and over time I realized that I’m a really, really shitty employee.
I’m in a privileged position to be able to say that, I know. Not everyone has the choice of just not working or taking time off of work to focus on their own business or side hustles.
In 2021, I want to really try to narrow down and focus on a few projects, instead of trying to do everything.
Dreaming big and having a lot of ideas is wonderful- but it’s not realistic. Building a successful business, or achieving a certain goal requires us to put other things aside for the time being.
I intend to spend the year focused on a few specific projects. The first of which is this blog, I know that it has the potential to grow into something even bigger and more spectacular than it is right now.
I have a few other projects in mind, but for at least the first part of the year I want to focus on the blog solely. Once I feel comfortable that I have reliable systems in place and can reasonably add another project, I will do so.
7. Set a schedule + (mostly) stick to it
Sticking to a schedule is not one of my strong suits. I’m not built for rules or timelines.
I’ve never been the kind of mom who makes up schedules for her kids’ daily activities because I can barely keep track of my own daily activities.
However, this is something I’d like to try to improve.
No, you won’t catch me trying to wrangle my kids into a routine with color-coded charts and time blocked activities.
But, I do want to try to evaluate where in my day I have time to implement scheduled work time.
For example, I’m home with my kids Monday-Thursday from 7 am – 6 pm while my husband is working. One of my kids is in virtual school during the day, and the other is a two-year-old.
Friday-Sunday my husband is home, and usually takes the kids to his mom’s to give me some alone time.
I do use this time to work if I’m in the mood. But most of the time, I go for a run, take a really long, uninterrupted shower and watch Netflix.
My goal is to change my perspective of this weekly alone time. I want to start thinking of this time as scheduled work time, instead of ‘free time’.
8. Create a workspace that works for you
One thing that I feel really sets me back from being as efficient as I could be is the fact that I don’t have a dedicated office in our home.
When our daughter started virtual school this year, I went all out making her a cute space to work from.
Complete with a new desk, office chair, artwork for the walls, school supplies, etc.
My goal was to create an environment that fostered creativity and tranquility so that we could ease her into this new school setting in the most comfortable way possible.
She now has a nice quiet space upstairs, away from any distractions where she does all of her schoolwork.
My plan is to start 2021 off with a new workspace for myself.
If you’re able to, setting up a nice space for yourself to work from at home is important for your productivity.
I know personally, it’s hard for me to get any work done when I’m surrounded by chaos or clutter. I mean, it’s possible- and sometimes it’s the only option right? But I want to try to create a space for myself that fosters my creativity and allows me to work in peace.
9. More vulnerability. Less fear.
This past year, being forced to spend some quality alone time with my thoughts has made me realize a few things.
For starters, I believe that I’ve been holding myself back from achieving the things I most want in life. I have literally been standing in my own way, and then wondering why I never get anything done.
Sure, there are obstacles outside of my control. There’s also the fact that I’m a mom of two, and I have a lot on my plate already. But these are just excuses, and I know it.
I have also realized that one of the main reasons I think I have not accomplished so many of the goals I have set for myself is because I have, for almost my entire life, shied away from genuine human connection.
I’ve shielded myself from being vulnerable, never allowing anyone in fully.
What I’ve come to realize is that I have most likely missed out on so many opportunities because of this. If I had allowed myself to connect with other people in a real, authentic way I might have discovered new and exciting opportunities for myself and my business.
I’m sure I would have.
This is something that won’t happen overnight, it’s going to take a lot of concentrated effort on my part.
I hope that in 2021, I will be more courageous. More authentic. More vulnerable.
I hope that you will be too because I believe this is the key to achieving all of our 2021 goals.
Let’s stop being afraid, and start believing that we can have everything we ever wanted. As long as we’re willing to work for it.
XO, M

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